Every film you've watched in 2016


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X-Men: Apocalypse-I fucking loved this movie. It's oppressively reminding you of its epicness, but it earns its screentime way more than any of the Marvel movies. It ain't bloated. In fact, it feels like it's missing story like BvS did. Apocalypse was an awesome villain and there's a whole shitload to unpack  in this. Turner and Sheridan were awesome as Jean and Cyke. I didn't even mind Jennifer Lawrence. I can't wait for another X-Men movie after this, especially after the stinger.

The Man in the Shadows: feature for the festival

Features: 112

Shorts: 61

Documentaries: 8

 

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The Overnight: Mostly watched it for Adam Scott and it sounded like a fun comedy. Then it started to feel weird. Not strange weird, like uncomfortable weird. Then it has a slight genre shift and I checked out. Still, it's a good movie up until the last 20 minutes.

Films: 71
Documentaries: 1
Rewatches: 3

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JFK (Director's Cut), directed by Oliver Stone:

After hearing an NPR interview with a biographer on Bobby Kennedy and Oliver Stone's episode of the Nerdist podcast, I finally decided to check this out as I've been meaning to for years. I understand that this thing has been totally assailed with "that's bullshit!" cries before, during and after the film came and went, but I also know that there are definitely facts in the movie that are not true. During the first act where they investigate Lee Harvey Oswald, going over every crumb of his life a few years before 1963, I wasn't really with the movie. It came across as really rambling and overtly conspiratorial, even if I got the point it was establishing in constructing Oswald as a character who's life doesn't add up when considering him the killer of the President. It wasn't until the Mr. X scene with Donald Sutherland that I started to really get hooked. The courtroom scene at the end is utterly captivating and, as an American, really gut-wrenching.

Ultimately I can't go with the film's assertions and implications that the conspiracy to kill Kennedy went all the way up to Lyndon Johnson. That's a bit too "Illuminati" for me, especially from what I know of Johnson basically dying because of the toll the Vietnam War took on him. I will say that at this time I believe the Warren Commission to be a complete crock of shit, and that between the Zapruder film, the ridiculous "Magic Bullet" theory the Warren Commission had the gall to put forth, the eyewitnesses and the botched autopsy, it's nigh-incontrovertible that there had to be a second gunman which definitely points to a conspiracy.

Above all else it was a very engaging film with a great cast. John Candy as a beatnik was pretty cool, and Kevin Costner was great. Joe Pesci was...Joe Pesci in a cartoony wig.

 

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Jim Jeffries: Freedumb-Jeffries doing what he does best: ripping America a new asshole. Netflix has really been great for stand-up comedy. This motherfucker spent probably just a few months coming up with AN HOUR AND A HALF OF MATERIAL and put it out immediately by selling it to Netflix, making topical shit. Fantastic. Jeffries isone of the best right now.

Features: 113

Shorts: 62

Documentaries: 9

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Troll 2: There are some films that I will always find fun. Is Troll 2 bad? Oh, fuck yes but it just keeps getting worse as it goes and spirals into this awesome trainwreck that makes me crack up constantly. Definitely one of my favorite bad movies.

A Nightmare on Elm Street: First off, I will always love the fake-out on the protagonist of the film. It makes Tina's death all the more wrenching. Really, I'll always love Nightmare just for how great it looks and feels for how little they put into it moneywise.

Films: 73
Documentaries: 1
Rewatches: 3

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A Nightmare on Elm Street: First off, I will always love the fake-out on the protagonist of the film. It makes Tina's death all the more wrenching. Really, I'll always love Nightmare just for how great it looks and feels for how little they put into it moneywise.

Tina, wrapped in plastic, standing in the hallway is one of the true great horror moments.

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Probably my favorites from 1 are the wall press, and Rod's death. The wall press because of how amazing it is, and Rod's death because it proved, more than any of the others, that Freddy was gonna come for all of the teenagers, and none of their parents would believe their warnings. That's probably the scariest part of the movie for me.

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A Nightmare on Elm Street: First off, I will always love the fake-out on the protagonist of the film. It makes Tina's death all the more wrenching. Really, I'll always love Nightmare just for how great it looks and feels for how little they put into it moneywise.

Tina, wrapped in plastic, standing in the hallway is one of the true great horror moments.

In many ways, the first is a masterpiece, but especially as it pertains to practical effects. The only two that are iffy (and always have been) are the scene where Freddy becomes Mister Fantastic in the alley, and when Nancy's mom is pulled through the windows. While I accept the former because it's a nightmare, I cannot give the latter the same leeway. Maybe it's because Freddy's arms are actually moving, maybe it's because he's in the shadows, or maybe it's because that moment is so engrossing, but it works for what it is. Nancy's mom, on the other hand, is clearly a dummy and the daylight serves to highlight this.

That very minor gripe aside, I love the movie and watch it whenever I have a chance.

I'm thinking I might go through the rest of the films in the franchise in the next few weeks. 3 has always been my favorite but we'll see if that changes.

I have a very deep soft spot for the fourth one, if only because my dad bought me a used VHS copy of the movie, which I watched all the time.

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Jim Jeffries: Freedumb-Jeffries doing what he does best: ripping America a new asshole. Netflix has really been great for stand-up comedy. This motherfucker spent probably just a few months coming up with AN HOUR AND A HALF OF MATERIAL and put it out immediately by selling it to Netflix, making topical shit. Fantastic. Jeffries isone of the best right now.

Features: 113

Shorts: 62

Documentaries: 9

Whilst I haven't seen the special, I love Jeffries because he's both very intelligent and very profane.

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Jim Jeffries: Freedumb-Jeffries doing what he does best: ripping America a new asshole. Netflix has really been great for stand-up comedy. This motherfucker spent probably just a few months coming up with AN HOUR AND A HALF OF MATERIAL and put it out immediately by selling it to Netflix, making topical shit. Fantastic. Jeffries isone of the best right now.

Whilst I haven't seen the special, I love Jeffries because he's both very intelligent and very profane.

What I appreciated about this one was about how he would swing styles from someone like Dave Atell to "take my wife, please" style shit, but it was magical. Then of course, there's the profanity. He's a master of it, of course. There's also a ranty span for about 7 minutes that's remarkably unfunny, but profound. Super solid. Not many comedy specials are feature length, let alone almost 100 minutes. Good shit.

The Killer In The House: feature for the fest

Features: 114

Shorts: 62

Documentaries: 9

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I'm suddenly thinking I should have pulled out Abe's Tomb but I felt like being merciful and went with an aggressively shitty space movie instead.

For the record, Abe's Tomb is probably the worst movie ever for me. Abe's Tomb is where good cinema goes to die. It's local cinema but when it hits the point that you can watch it on Amazon, it ceases being immune.

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The Secret Life of Pets: was too tired to update last night. Saw this with the family in the theater. Like most theatrical kids movies, it was ok and funny in parts. Most amusing thing was the voice cast, full of crude comedians and alt-hipster comedians. 

Features: 115

Shorts: 62

Documentaries: 9

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