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The Master

Every Film You've Watched in 2019

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Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003): This is one of those times where less would have been more. Some of the gore could have been toned down, and it would have been a better movie, and scarier. There was very little in the remake that tied it to 1974, and it could have very easily taken place in 2003.

I saw this in the theater in 2003 and I was stunned to see someone had brought a child to the screening.

Films Watched: 22

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Paris is Burning: I watched a lot of Drag Race in the last week and I felt the need to go back to the source. Interesting as fuck documentary about The New York Ballroom Scene in the 80s. Even without taking into account of how much it and the scene influenced gay culture, it's even more interesting how much it has slowly permeated into mainstream culture (the fact that shade is a common term now when it had to be explained in the feature).

Films: 84
Documentary: 1
MST3K/Rifftrax Assisted:
2
Repeats: 3

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Copycat: We have full video chat over dial up in 1995. Nope. I am old enough to remember dial-up internet in the 1990's. That doesn't happen. There are other problems with the movie, but that is the only thing I guffawed at.

Films watched: 23

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Reefer Madness: The Musical version. Somehow, this is more poignant today.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Because sometimes you need something absurd in this world.

Rent: There aren't that many musicals streaming online so... well... I don't always make good choices.

Films: 87
Documentary: 1
MST3K/Rifftrax Assisted:
2
Repeats: 3

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The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2009): review forthcoming

Hellboy: inappropriately maligned. Not a good movie, but not the turd everyone said it was. It felt like a Hellboy movie, but cheaper. The CGI was pretty awful for a movie like this in 2019. I liked Harbour just fine and the nods to the comic, but the story suffered as a result of all the "hey, let's homage the comics with this scene" scenes (spoiler: there are  a lot of them).

The Mule: Probably Eastwood's best performance since Unforgiven. This was really great.

The Old Man and the Gun: Robert Redford, Danny Glover and Tom Waits as a gang in a heist film in 2019? Yes, please. Unfortunately, not a lot of Waits or Glover. Too much Casey Affleck as the investigator. Thinking back about the Game for Real Men: Sissy Spacek can still get it, man.

A Simple Favor: pabulum. But decent pabulum. I'm over Anna Kendrick. I really liked Blake Lively in this one. More dimension than I've seen her do before.

Skyscraper: this was just pure dumb fun. As plausible as any Mission Impossible film. The Rock is obviously charismatic and Neve Campbell was lovely.

Adrift: I don't get the appeal of Shailene Woodley. I don't understand it. Like watching someone who never knows where she is. Awful.

Ant Man & The Wasp: I don't think I've seen this this year so I won't count it as a rewatch.

Features: 77

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 7

 Rewatches: 4

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Spider-Man: Far from  Home: One part of Mysterio's final revenge makes sense and would seriously mess up Peter Parker's life, but the other part makes no sense as it could be nullified and turned into a positive in literally thirty minutes of real time - thirty minutes that could easily be condensed into two minutes of movie time. I actually saw this 7/22.

Films watched: 24

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Fellowship of the Ring: This bothered me in 2001 and still bothers me. The Orcs are too weak. You should not have multiple Orcs fall before one character, whether it be a human, dwarf or Elf. Having Orcs get killed by Hobbits undermines them even more and makes them significantly less scary. They were totally buried.

Films watched: 25

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Cabin Fever: review forthcoming

Knock Knock:  review forthcoming

Black Panther: Killmonger is probably Marvel's best villain. Everything of this film outside the Black Panther scenes makes it one of the very best MCU films, but the action looks so horrible, it detracts for the rest fo the film. I'll never watch this again. It's going to age even worse.

Features: 80

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 7

 Rewatches: 4

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Cabin Fever 2016 or 2002? The remake was inferior to the original. The 2002 version was very tongue-in-cheek. (I still cringe at the N word scene, though.) They tried to play it straight in 2016, but did not go all the way with playing it straight. There was too much camp and comedy. Either play it straight or don't.

This is unfortunate. The concept of a fast-spreading lethal virus is terrifying.

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8 hours ago, S-T said:

Cabin Fever 2016 or 2002? The remake was inferior to the original. The 2002 version was very tongue-in-cheek. (I still cringe at the N word scene, though.) They tried to play it straight in 2016, but did not go all the way with playing it straight. There was too much camp and comedy. Either play it straight or don't.

This is unfortunate. The concept of a fast-spreading lethal virus is terrifying.

The original. It's such a wildly uneven film. Excited to review it with Duane. Lots to talk about.

The Upside: not bad. Terribly predictable, but anchored by some amazing performances.

Night School: I think I'm in love with Tiffany Haddish. 

21 Jump Street: still fucking hilarious.

22 Jump Street: beating a dead horse.

Features: 84

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 7

 Rewatches: 4

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In both Jump Street movies, I found myself fast forwarding to whenever Ice Cube was on screen.

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The Endless: Watching this so soon after Resolution only adds to the experience, tbh. While you can technically watch this movie on its own, without the context of Resolution, I don't really recommend it. 

Films Watched: 32

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Mr. Frost/A Perfect Getaway: films for review

Dawn of the Dead (2004): rewatch for review

Features: 86

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 7

Rewatches: 5

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Apocalypse Now: Watched the extended cut in the theater yesterday, after not seeing it for ages. Except for a bit where Willard visits a French plantation that drags ass, this movie does not feel as long as it actually is. I legitimately love this movie, despite it being one of the pinnacle 'cishet white fuckboy' movies, alongside Scarface, Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill or any of those things. But man, this movie still holds up really well. Like, you could make this movie tomorrow, set it in the Middle East, and not have to change a goddamn thing. Also, it goes without saying, but fuck war, fuck America, and fuck the troops. And fuck cops, especially whatever dumbfuck cop you're related to. 

Films Watched: 33

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Session 9: It's definitely a better tone, mood and atmosphere piece than anything else, really. It's not very plot heavy, exactly, but it's fine, ultimately. 

Films Watched: 34

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Repossession/Flesh City/Hager/Nefarious: features fo the festival

Features: 90

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 7

Rewatches: 5

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Hellboy (2019): I'm someone who takes his Hellboy pretty seriously, and I was furious when Perlman and Del Toro lost their Hellboy 3. That said, this didn't deserve the critical and commerical beating it took. Harbour was good, but suffers from comparison to Perlman. The supporting cast was solid, the story was fun, and Thomas Hayden Church was born to play Lobster Johnson. 

If this was the only Hellboy movie, it would be beloved. It's just unfairly compared to two movies made by a very talented visionary director.  The GDT movies were objectively just better films, but this struck that, weird nasty chord that the comics have, in a big way. 

...Some of the CGI was pretty dodgy, though. Looking at you, Ben Daimio. 

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Steve Martin and Martin Short: An Evening You Will Forget for the Rest Of Your Life: this was a really fun vaudeville throwback musical revue show from two very talented funny guys. I really want to rewatch Three Amigos now.

Oh Hello on Broadway: still the funniest performance film I've seen in ages. Laughed until my face hurt and my throat was raw on the second viewing. 

Features: 90

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 9

Rewatches: 5

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Star Trek: First Contact: I kind of rewatched it to get psyched for the Picard show. It's a lot of fun and a decent action movie.

A Very Brady Sequel: The Brady films from the 90s are still pretty terrific, fun for both fans of the show and not.

Trancers: I wanted something on while playing Civ 5. It's a dumb 80s action movie with some sci-fi elements. It's okay.

Invader Zim: Enter the Florpus: As a finale of the show, it works. As an extra long episode, it works. I feel like Zim works better in small doses but this was pretty good regardless.

Films: 91
Documentary: 1
MST3K/Rifftrax Assisted:
2
Repeats: 3

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Jackass: The Movie: this has to be the first time I've watched a movie three times in a year since we've been counting on this forum. I am sure I watched School of Rock 297 times in 2010, but anyway. I watched this with my oldest and my dad. I don't think a theatrical comedy has been made since this was released that is anywhere near as funny. 

Features: 90

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 9

Rewatches: 6

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9 hours ago, Dread said:

Jackass: The Movie: this has to be the first time I've watched a movie three times in a year since we've been counting on this forum. I am sure I watched School of Rock 297 times in 2010, but anyway. I watched this with my oldest and my dad. I don't think a theatrical comedy has been made since this was released that is anywhere near as funny. 

Features: 90

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 9

Rewatches: 6

I agree with the sentiment - I was exactly the right age for Jackass when it came out - but Hot Fuzz came out later, in 2008.

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On 8/28/2019 at 10:10 AM, slothian said:

I agree with the sentiment - I was exactly the right age for Jackass when it came out - but Hot Fuzz came out later, in 2008.

For some reason I always peg Hot Fuzz to 2005. Weird. That's the year I saw Shaun of the Dead I guess. Yes, I am now aware of the pun.

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Instant Family: g/f and I took our kids away for a couple days and vegged out to watch this. It's typical manipulative schmaltzy fare, but is incredibly elevated by Rose Byrne and relative newcomer Isabella Moner. Decent watch for a family movie night.

Features: 91

Shorts: 15

Documentaries: 9

Rewatches: 6

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