Brainiac VS. The Phalanx VS. The Borg


James D.

Which parasitic techno-entity would destroy the others first?  

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Battle of the Parasitic Techno-entities!!!

Place: New York City

Conditions:

--Each being starts on one side of New York (in a triangle) and works its way through NYC to assimilate the entire city. When they all inevitably meet, who will overcome the others and devour the city?

--No superheroes (or anyone else for that matter) can interfere with any of them to stop them. The city is basically doomed. This is between the massive Phalanx, the Borg, and Brainiac and his interstellar craft.

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After thinking about this, I've come up with the following.

Just as six Borg soldiers are deployed to assess the situation, the Phalanx (realizing they can't properly defend two sides at once) swoop in and assimilate Brainiac-13. With him added to their arsenal, they appear to be unstoppable -- especially after they consume one of the Borg and systematically destroy the other five.

What the Phalanx did not/could not know is that those six Borg soldiers did exactly what they were assigned to do. Though assimilated, the Borg continues to function as part of the Collective -- sending back critical data about the Phalanx. And the five that were destroyed have taught the Collective how to defend themselves against the Phalanx.

With this knowledge in hand, the Borg rip through the Phalanx like papier-mâché, assimilating most and destroying the rest.

Having won, the Borg turn towards New York City (and the rest of the world), preparing to absorb its technologies and peoples, but little did either side know that Brainiac-13 had an ace up his sleeve.

Much as he did with Metropolis, Brainiac-13 incorporated himself into the city before being assimilated by the Phalanx (and subsequently by the Borg). So when the Borg swarm the city, Brainiac-13's systems (the city itself) fight back, assimilating the Borg Collective (and the Phalanx they assimilated).

In but a few moments New York City is miraculously reborn from the ashes, utilizing Phalanx, Borg, and Brainiac-13 technologies to become a shimmering, futuristic skyline. It doesn't stop there, however, as the alien technology spreads worldwide, consuming everything (save life forms) in a matter of hours. And though there is initial fright, the change is for the better -- people don't have to worry about anything any more (jobs, war, government), as everything is taken care of for them by the new world leader: Brainiac-14.

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