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SuaveStar

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I thought it was average at best. They did the copout thing they always seem to do with standups and just had him do his routine as the monologue. No really memorable skits, and I thought FUN was actually the best part of the show.

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I thought fun were awful, but each to their own.

Watching Nathan Barley. Still a brilliant cacophany of awful upsettingness that's somehow even more accurate today than when it arrived.

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Fast Sofa - I have been waiting to watch this for 11 years since I saw the trailer in a VHS of something I got from the library. It has always stuck in my brain for some reason. And it just so happens that it is on Netflix instant streaming. Two-ish hours later and I have no idea what the fuck that was supposed to be. The trailer made it seem like a 'buddy road trip' movie with Jake Busey and Crispin Glover. Instead, I got a movie in which things happened and nothing was resolved. And Crispin Glover being more Crispin Glovery than usual.

Bad Ass - Danny Trejo kicks ass. With a pretty sweet beard. Pretty standard 'Walking Tall' type movie. Completely average.

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Moonraker: Well, this was a mess. Holly Goodhead, outside of being the worst named Bond Girl, just plain sucked. Then it becomes laughable. It's supposed to be a spy film, not an action movie. Finally, why is Jaws here other than to get a girlfriend?

Shameless (U.S.): I fucking loved season 1 of this show. It got so much of the feeling of lower class life and the petty crime that can sometimes pop up in it. All of the actors were great in it, especially the kids. It's so rare that we can get realistic child actors in anything. The standouts of the case are William H. Macy as Frank, the alcoholic patriarch of the family, Emmy Rossum as the oldest daughter who has to take care of everyone, Joan Cussack as Sheila, the agoraphobic neighbor that Frank takes advantage of, and Cameron Monaghan as Ian, the closeted middle son. I really hope Netflix gets season 2 before I'm forced to resort to the internet fairy for my next fix.

Beach Girls and the Monster: Well, it was a movie. The monster looks goofy,even for a B-Monster Movie, the acting gets hilariously incompetent, and the music is this side of making Frankie and Annette throw up at it. I give it some props for the twist to the ending though.

Children of the Corn 3: Urban Harvest: Holy shit this thing was hilarious! I've seen it before but I forgot how bad the actors were at pretending to be "street." The relationship between the brothers is corny as all hell and I never once believed that they were. Finally, after two movies, we finally get to see He Who Walks Behind the Rows and it is fucking terrible. There is no getting around what looks like the bastard child of Wallace and Gromit and a corn patch.

The Brotherhood 2: Young Warlocks: I had to assure everyone during bad movie night that this was not gay porn. There is no gay sex, just a bunch of guys who keep on stripping down to their boxer briefs, get incredibly close, and keep on giving each other looks. The entire movie has this voiceover that just scream unnecessary but what takes the cake is the fact that for a horror movie, nothing happens. At all.

Red Riding Hood: Italian movie about a 14 year old girl who believes that her imaginary friend is out punishing wrong doers in Rome when it's just her committing violent acts without any remorse then torturing her grandmother. Not terrible, has some good moments, but the protagonist is so psycotically unlikable that I found myself wondering why I was still watching it.

Carrie: Probably my second favorite De Palma film, between Phantom of the Paradise and The Untouchables. Outside of the questionable use of split-screen during the prom scene, I have few complaints about this movie. The relationship between Carrie and her mother is the highlight of the film. You can tell that Margaret cares for her in her own way and that she loves her daughter, just... not correctly. In the end, the moral of the story is to be nice to the tortured but also if you feel like taking pity on them, don't because they're just going to develop TK and kill everyone you know and love.

Freddy Vs. Jason: It doesn't feel like a Jason movie, doesn't feel like a Freddy movie. I don't remember disliking it so much.

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Freddy Vs. Jason: It doesn't feel like a Jason movie, doesn't feel like a Freddy movie. I don't remember disliking it so much.

The novelty of them facing off made it seem better than it actually was. I saw it a few months ago as well, it tries to cater to both Jason and Freddy, but just sort of ends up a jumbled, shitty mess.

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Freddy Vs. Jason: It doesn't feel like a Jason movie, doesn't feel like a Freddy movie. I don't remember disliking it so much.

The novelty of them facing off made it seem better than it actually was. I saw it a few months ago as well, it tries to cater to both Jason and Freddy, but just sort of ends up a jumbled, shitty mess.

Except for the fact that it's awesome....

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Moonraker: Well, this was a mess. Holly Goodhead, outside of being the worst named Bond Girl, just plain sucked. Then it becomes laughable. It's supposed to be a spy film, not an action movie. Finally, why is Jaws here other than to get a girlfriend?

1) Dr Christmas Jones, Mary Goodnight and Xenia Onatopp make for stiff competition. So to speak.

2) Goodhead can at least pilot a spaceship and punch a guy. But the actress is awfully wooden.

3) Since Goldfinger, Bond has never really been a straight up spy franchise. Dr No and From Russian With Love are arguably spy films, but after that, they are action-adventure films with a spy film veneer.

4) Jaws was the breakout star of the Spy Who Loved Me. Unfortunately, Cubby Broccoli took that to mean he needs to be dumbed down to appeal to the kids.

Ultimately, Moonraker was one of those occasions when the Bond franchise yanged so badly that the producers needed to reset the equilibrium. Think OHMSS-Diamonds Are Forever-Live And Let Die (after Lazenby and Connery's films put noses out of joint), The Man With The Golden Gun-The Spy Who Loved Me (producers fell out, Golden Gun wasn't great), Moonraker-For Your Eyes Only (swapping stupid sci-fi for a more low-key film), A View to a Kill-Living Daylights (Moore's age), Die Another Day-Casino Royale (a film so bad the film needs rebooting).

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Freddy Vs. Jason: It doesn't feel like a Jason movie, doesn't feel like a Freddy movie. I don't remember disliking it so much.

The novelty of them facing off made it seem better than it actually was. I saw it a few months ago as well, it tries to cater to both Jason and Freddy, but just sort of ends up a jumbled, shitty mess.

Except for the fact that it's awesome....

And had Kelly Rowland in it.

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I just watched the seventh episode of Go On and found out it's on Wednesdays now. And I'm like... what?

And How I Met Your Mother was great. Jason Segel was fantastic as always.

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3 episodes in to Person of Interest season one and I am LOVING it. It's like "what if Doc Savage was split into two people?" Awesome.

The first episode of Justified was great too, but Megan didn't like it so it'll be slow-going getting through that considering all my solo watching goes on after she goes to bed and that consists mostly of movies.

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Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter: I really enjoyed it. It was very dude-bro at times, like a video game. I'm just afraid that when I watch Lincoln I'm going to be bored by the lack of vampires.

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3 episodes in to Person of Interest season one and I am LOVING it. It's like "what if Doc Savage was split into two people?" Awesome.

The first episode of Justified was great too, but Megan didn't like it so it'll be slow-going getting through that considering all my solo watching goes on after she goes to bed and that consists mostly of movies.

Person of Interest is AWESOME. I love it, I love the characters, the writing, all of it.

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For Your Eyes Only: I'm rather meh on this. The beginning with Not-Blofeld seemed out of place. Where it needed to be was at the beginning of Live and Let Die. As is, it added nothing to the movie that followed. The music sounded right out of an episode of Miami Vice. Also, everything with the ice skater seemed unnecessary.

Octopussy: This felt like the best one in the bunch which is not saying much. Octopussy was a pretty good Bond girl but I wanted to throw up everytime she said, "Oh James." The circus thing was cute. I'm still trying to figure out what was the exact plan of the villain.

A View to a Kill: Burn it! The redeeming thing to this movie is that it ended. May Day was the real Bond Girl and the redeeming feature to the movie. Moore is getting too old at this point and he should have retired sooner. The Bond girl we got, Stacey Sutton, was so forced into the story. She screams so much that I was hoping she would have burnt up in the fire. As is, I'll settle for Red Foreman calling her a dumb-ass a decade later.

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Octopussy: This felt like the best one in the bunch which is not saying much. Octopussy was a pretty good Bond girl but I wanted to throw up everytime she said, "Oh James." The circus thing was cute. I'm still trying to figure out what was the exact plan of the villain.

The greatest minds of our time would have trouble coherently explaining Khan's motivations for indulging a deranged Steven Berkoff.

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Watched the Mortal Kombat: Legacy webseries. Gotta say, I was disappointed. Not that they are not well done or anything. More of not exactly what I was expecting, based on the trailer that I saw a while ago. That said, I still wish they could have actually gotten to a second season, if for nothing else than to see the actual tournament.

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Watched the Mortal Kombat: Legacy webseries. Gotta say, I was disappointed. Not that they are not well done or anything. More of not exactly what I was expecting, based on the trailer that I saw a while ago. That said, I still wish they could have actually gotten to a second season, if for nothing else than to see the actual tournament.

I thought the first few episodes were good, but then it just became boring and a chore to watch.

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I found some episodes of Superhuman Samurai Syber-Squad online. While this was always third in my list of Power Rangers knock-offs (VR Troopers and Beetleborgs being 1-2), I generally remembered this show being a fun mix of Save By The Bell & Power Rangers. I remember liking this show. Today I question if my younger self was doing massive amounts of crack. This was terrible. I have no idea how someone could have thought this finished product was any good.

Also, Tim Curry. Why?

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I’ve nearly finished the first season of Veep. It’s pretty great. Julia Louis-Dreyfus does great as a power hungry woman who struggles to make a legacy for herself as Vice President. But really, the whole thing is supported by an incredible cast. Especially Matt Walsh. The back and forths between all the characters are so fucking good.

The only thing I’d previously seen by Armando Iannucci was In The Loop, which I liked, but felt like a small scale TV show squeezed and mixed up to work as a movie. Veep feels a lot more natural. I just love how everyone is sort of teetering on the edge of losing complete control at all times. I like that they don’t make Selina into a Leslie Knope styled do-gooder either. Which is not to say I don’t love Parks And Recreation, but I like that she’s kind of a manipulative and power hungry and willing to make deals with bad people to forward her career. Her main strength is her ability to manipulate her staff to do what she wants, rather than being a force of nature herself.

Anyway. It’s a good show.

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