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The Master

Post of the Day

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Once again, Des proves that his children are awesome.

And for the record, both of his children have now won Post of the Day! (Okay, Daddy Doomsday posted it, but the awesomeness is all Cade's.)

Another bizarre exchange with Cade this morning as I got him dressed.

Cade: Daddy, does Batman have a penis?

Me: Yes.

Cade: Does Flash have a penis?

Me: Yes.

Cade: Hawkgirl has a penis.

Me: What because she's tough? You're a misogynist.

And then, he stood up on his bed, still buck naked, and jumped off onto the floor of his room while making a noise I assume was supposed to be "Ta-da!" but sounded a lot like, no shitting, "Ad-ham!"

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Nicolette on chick flicks:

I really like this idea. Though, to be fair, I don't mind action movies so much (though I prefer ones of the action/sci-fi variety), and most chick flicks make me want to trade in my vagina.

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Des on why Fin Fang Foom wears shorts:

And prez...take it back! Fin Fang Foom is not a moron. He is a badass mutherfucker of a dragon! But he's a gentleman badass motherfucker of a dragon. He wears shorts so his errant tallywacker doesn't knock buildings over that he doesn't want knocked over.

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Nicolette writes a theme song for suavestar:

My own theme song would be nice though...

SUAVESTAR!

Comin' at you on the Twitter--

SUAVESTAR!

Ornery, crass, and bitter--

SUAVESTAR! [drumfill/synth] SUAVESTAR!

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Regarding Teen Titans being in the DCAU, suavestar said:

Oh sweet fucking jesus.

There are more important things to be discussed.

Does the friday the 13th movie 2009 fall into the same continuity of the original series?

Does freddy vs Jason make sense in that same films fall in the same continuity.

Maybe Booster Gold went back in time and to fix an anamoly in time put Teen Titans in continuity because it was causing people on the Unternet to go nuts.

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Regarding who enjoys TNA's King of the Mountain matches, suavestar noted:

My nephew wasplaying around with me and doing wrestling.

One of the things he said "I pinned you, and now I climb the ladder and get the title."

He basically wanted to do TNA's king of the mountain match.

He's never seen TNA before, and I just find it funny, that the only people who'd think that KOTM was a good idea were children under 7 and Vince Russo.

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Regarding my inability to buy a Milky Way, dc20willsave said:

Damn, the universe is playing a sick joke on you. That... kinda sucks. The Milky Way just stares at you, taunting and laughing. I say you break the machine open and grab the candy out with your bleeding hands for how it's treating you. How dare that candy mock you? You chase down thieves, intimidate mobs, sleep in the same house as Rape-Whistle Ronald without fear, and put up with the insane asylum of a message board that is out lot and it dares try to separate you from it's chocolaty caramel goodness? Doesn't it know who you are? You're the Goddamn Sims.

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Suavestar reality-punches his way to another Post of the Day:

Actually, Earth-43 is the Vampire Batman Earth which Donna Troy and Company visit in Countdown so no, you still don't escape Countdown there. There you just risk becoming part of it. :P

But I, you see I had to....That's it, I'm moving to Earth-Prime, nothing and no one bad ever comes from there....

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Normally I wouldn't give myself Post of the Day, but Des awarded it to me for claiming that a female Deadpool was:

The Merc with a Muff.

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It would seem Doug has figured out my secret:

Is Mike batman?

-He's grumpy, but truly good-natured

-He always has alot on his plate

-His companions are Niki, James, Dread and Dan (Batgirl, Robin, Nightwing and Alfred)

-He has travled the world (Or at least to the World Showcase)

bm2.jpg

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DW proves he's more British than myself:

A mere tea challenge? Are you daft? One doesn't simply drink their way into the Queen's culture!

I'll have you know that at this moment I own a top hat, a cane, AND a monocle. On top of that, I love crummy weather and I'm dead on the inside. I'm more a Brit than you could ever imagine.

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DW on Ultimatium:

Ultimatium - One of the best fan parodies I've read all year. You guys should check it out. Some kid from Connecticut named Jeph wrote a story about what would happen if the editors at Marvel completely lost their shit and decided they just didn't care anymore. It's funny too, they're even selling this one in bookstores, like it's a proper comic or something.

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Knocking the Saw franchise is always a good way to score a Post of the Day, and suavestar did it quite well:

Hey! Saw doesn't spend 90 minutes telling you how smart it is.

It treats you like a tit for watching them for the first 89, and then the last minutes spent on the "Look how smart we are, play my music!" part.

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Just like knocking Saw will earn you a Post of the Day, so will bashing Jeph Loeb. And dc20willsave does a wonderful job of it:

I feel bad because a great character like She-Hulk, who was being handled by a great writer like Peter David, is dragged into god awful shit like this when she's probably the only well-adjusted character involved but I'm sure Jeph Loeb doesn't care as long as she ends up in a pin-up getting beaten up by his "creative" creation, Red She-Hulk and he can say, "Look, she's better and will sell so many books!" Marvel will proceed to give her a terrible book written by Loeb, the real She-Hulk will end up in limbo for a few years until we finally get the revelation that Red She-Hulk is Anna Watson, Jeph Loeb has proceeded away from the Hulk and is now writing the mystery of who Orange Daredevil (Or Oredevil) is, and Peter David makes fun of it all in the She-Hulk #1 Vol 6 with Jennifer Walters offering Red She-Hulk to Mephisto in exchange for her own series.

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On who should be the hero of Blackest Night, suavestar has a brilliant idea:

Hasn't he had like ten years over everyone besides Alan Scott as a Green lantern?

I want Alan Scott to save the day with ease, grab a paper and have his lantern make a pipe and armchair constructs, begin to read the paper and say "God damn kids...."

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Stavros imagines a Doctor Who / Scooby Doo crossover:

Fun episode guys. The idea of a Dr Who episode being like Scooby Doo set some disturbing wheels in motion in my head, I mean, what if you combined the two shows into one horrible entity known as Scooby Who? Shaggy dressed like the 4th Doctor, the Tardis having a green and purple paint just with Mystery Machine written down the side. A host of assistants plucked from different eras and a giant robotic K-9 to be Scooby himself.

Jamie: Now lets see who was under this mask all along...

Susan: Why its old man Davros!

Davros: Yes it was me! I faked a Dalek invasion of earth in order to keep the town from paving over this old fairground where I do all my experiments, and I would have gotten away with it too if is wasn't for you meddling kids!

Donna: Jinkies!

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Will takes it today for the obvious reason:

Because the only thing worse than being a failure is finding out that there are people out there failing better than you.

It's horrible to fail at failing.

It's possible to be the best at everything but impossible to to be the worst at everything because than you're the best at being the worst.

So, do I get a trophy?

No, just a small commemorative plate with Jeph Loeb saying, "I'm better than you."

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Posting this one a day late, but here's Niki's take on Dove Promises:

Dude, get Dove Promises. Best. Chocolate. Ever.

This sounds like a douching product. No lie.

"Dove promises, for when you would like to feel a little more fresh"

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Normally I don't give Post of the Day to myself, but Will nominated me, so here it is:

Looking at the BL Wonder Woman, at least we now know Greg Land isn't the only artist using porn stills to photo reference.

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Suavestar on my questionable sexuality:

Although we would all like to tap Jamie Lee Curtis, and especially Sigourney Weaver, I have never heard anyone before say "Even if she was a man, I'd still hit that!"

It's me. Do you expect any less? :P

Well, I expected it to be brought up sooner!

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And suavestar takes another one for writing a quick bit of Guy Gardner / Kyle Rayner slash fiction:

The angle that Guy and Kyle are flying at each other makes it look like they're going to kiss.

There are only two people who would say that, you and my other half. Neither of you would take notice of the chainsaw, and hope Guy would say "groovy".

Oh dear god, you know have me making a scene in my head with Guy cutting down a tree in Kyles garden and Kyle giving guy some lemonade, on a green tray....

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DW has something to say about the molestation of the English language:

Cockney isn't an accent. It's cancer of the speech.

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Will reacts to a familiar-looking sex doll:

edit: the sex-bot is a prossie Catherine Tate.

Oh dear god, it is. I am bothered.

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"Stop reading my notes!" Or... Des and I post nearly the same thing at the exact same time, earning us a POTD:

1. It's fake and says so.

2. Weekend at Bernie's is so far from a classic that it can't see Classic over the horizon

01. It's a joke.

02. Weekend at Bernie's is hardly an untouchable "classic."

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What's a surefire way to win Post of the Day? Praise Guns N Roses while slagging on The Beatles:

Dude, he's a Beatle. He's earned it. And outside of The Beatles, four words: Live and Let Die.

Dude, six words- Guns & Roses did it better.

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