MACHETE


D-Man

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It's funny, Dread and I were just talking about MACHETE last night and it's chances of seeing the light of day. Well, it turns out it's not only finished but it's coming out this summer on Labour Day weekend ( http://www.variety.com/article/VR1118017906.html?categoryid=13&cs=1 ).

Dread and I were discussing the three 80s throwback mercenaries on a mission movies coming out this summer, namely THE EXPENDABLES, THE A-TEAM, and THE LOSERS. I was leaning towards THE LOSERS as the one to watch, if only for the presence of Jeffrey Dean Morgan as the tough, scruffy leader. We were also discussing the possible future of MACHETE and how it may depend upon the success or failure of those other action pictures. At the time, I had no idea that MACHETE was finished and awaiting a release date. Now, with Rodriguez having not one but two pictures coming out this summer, including the promising PREDATORS, those other action vehicles just don't seem nearly as relevant to me anymore.

MACHETE has now taken the position as my number one summer movie I am most looking forward to. Danny Trejo dispensing hot Mexican Justice to those crooked, fat-cat gringos is something I've been excited to see for, well, ever since the trailer in GRINDHOUSE. And check out that additional casting. Robert De Niro, Jessica Alba, Michelle Rodriquez, Lindsay Lohan, Don Johnson, and, of course, Cheech Moran. Wow. Fuck those 80s mercenaries. I want my 70s Mexploitation right now.

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Definitely anticipating this one as well. The trailer was one of my favorite parts of Grindhouse also. The Weinstein Company seriously need to get off their asses and release the complete version of the film.

They haven't even released the much promised complete Kill Bill. Its like none of the initial promotion meant anything.

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GUYS! GUYS! GUYS!

This is a SPY KIDS FILM, I kid you not!

The character of Machete Cortez originates in the Spy Kids films as "Uncle Machete," the mysterious, estranged uncle of the child protagonists. And according to Wikipedia, Daryl Sabara (who played "Juni Cortez" in Spy Kids) is in Machete as "Julio Cortez."

Cheech Marin was in Spy Kids, too, as a spy who was constantly undercover with different identities. Maybe this new character is actually a new identity of his?

So, yeah. Machete is a Spy Kids spinoff.

Totally seeing this one now.

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HUGE bump, I know, but I finally saw this and was wondering what people actually thought of it. It was completely ridiculous - I must've rolled my eyes dozens of times - but it was fun for a one-time watch.

And Danny Trejo must have pictures of Steven Spielberg fucking a goat while Harvey Weinstein jerked off on James Cameron. The list of women Trejo has bedded on film is STUNNING: Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan and the chick playing Lohan's mom - just in this one movie!!!

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