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JasonC

A Spoof Movie I might actually watch

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The only thing I hate more than poorly written and over-marketed Twilight movies are poorly written and over-marketed parody movies.

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In my day, the vampires were mysterious and attracted to the high school girl, too. But the high school girl was interesting and had super-powers and the vampire was David Boreanez.

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In my day, the vampires were mysterious and attracted to the high school girl, too. But the high school girl was interesting and had super-powers and the vampire was David Boreanez.

In my day, vampires were old men who young women could not resist. And their vampire brides all looked like Monica Bellucci.

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In my day Vampires were mopey, often kinda gay, and prone to either existentialist dilemmas or inner monologued until there was no tomorrow.

They also often did around five levels of lethal damage to your average mortal and let me roll 7 ten-sided dice when convincing another member of my coven that I wasn't feeding on their thralls.

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And now, the Independents:

vikings1.png

vikings2.png

Meet Eric of True Blood (he's the one in the center), aka the Viking vampire, aka the one who refers to kids as tasty teacup humans.

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Allowed. But isn't it true that in modern day he drinks synthetic blood so as not to kill humans? Therefore Eric = pussy.

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And he kinda gets highlights.

eric-foil.jpg

I think he may still drink actual blood. (Note: I have not ever watched that show. Eric is the only reason I am considering doing so. Wikiing to double-check.)

EDIT: Also this:

Not Safe For Work
eric-true-blood-7865264-393-463.jpg

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Please...

I'm sorry, but because that comic spawned one of the worst animated adaptations of a comic book in recorded history, it loses many cool points.

And Alucard isn't the dandy. Tubalcain Alhambra is. :headbonk:

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Please...

I'm sorry, but because that comic spawned one of the worst animated adaptations of a comic book in recorded history, it loses many cool points.

And Alucard isn't the dandy. Tubalcain Alhambra is. :headbonk:

Right, and the vast majority fo the "geek world" doesn't even know it exists making it harmless.

Plus it's better than a lot of other "animated adaptations" I can think of.

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Hi, Spike and Angel are both amazing. Hate Whedon all you want, but the man can write vampires.

And he can certainly write buddy comedies with those vampires filled with uncomfortable sexual tension.

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