Final Round: Prince Humperdinck v Philip Stuckey


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Who: Prince Humperdinck

Actor: Chris Sarandon

Movie: The Princess Bride

Douche move(s): Forces a young woman to marry him against her will, plots her kidnapping and assassination to stage a war, tortures her true love to ("mostly") death, lies about said true love's fate to his bride-to-be, is named Humperdinck.

Who: Philip Stuckey

Actor: Jason Alexander

Movie: Pretty Woman

Douche move(s): Attempts to rape someone.

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Humperdink. Nearly raping a former hooker is nothing compared to having a man nearly tortured to death, mentally torturing the woman you're supposed to marry, arranging her kidnapping, and all so you can go to war for no real reason except you want to. Anyone who argues otherwise at this point, I really want you to justify yourself. Please do.

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They both have arrogance in spades and have similar attitudes to women - 'they will like me, I just need to convince them with rape/torture'

Unfortunately for Stuckey he just doesn't have the opportunity or power to truly throw himself into his douche-baggery and unlike Robbie (seriously, fuck Robbie) there's no chance of him even approaching Humperdinck's level. He does the best with what he has and, yes, I do like an underdog but it's got to be Humperdinck due to his swaggering exploitation of his power to do whatever the fuck he wants regardless.

Just proves that power doucherises us all.

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