The "I need to vent" thread


Missy

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The toilets of my 2 bathrooms are blocked. This wouldn't be a big deal, except for the fact that my room is stationed directly below one of these rooms and I now have effluent dripping through my ceiling, via my smoke alarm. FFS.

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So, let's recap the last 48 or so hours.

I get home from running some errands after work on Friday, expecting that as he said, the roomie would be moved out by then. He's not. As in, he's still got crap laying all over the apartment, and his room is messy as all hell. He comes back some 45 minutes later, passive aggressively showers and gets everything out. As he gets his crap out, I'm working on moving my bed into his room. He refuses to even vaccuum the room, which, dick. He also refuses to help me move my bed frame into the room, cause he bitches about how he's been moving the last three days. (Note that he's refused my help at every stage.) So, the friend who's tagging along with him attempts to help me move the bed frame out, which is going to be difficult, do to my bedroom being halfway down the galley kitchen that we have, but he wants to get moving, so she has to leave while it's stuck in the door, like so:

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An hour of lifting and adjusting later, I manage to get it into the new room that has AC in it, which, joy! Not so joy, however, is finding out through going through things that my roomie has decided to short me a plunger, a toilet brush, various cleaners, and a dish drying rack; all in all, about $50 of stuff. Note that he is going to Thailand for the next two months. There is no reason that he needs any of that, especially with a dishwasher at his new place.

After all this crap, I attempt to make dinner, which, as I find out, I only have about half the rice and usable garlic I thought I did, but still manage to salvage it, and the asparagus recipe I attempt turns out to be an inedible mess.

So, next morning, my father and I meet up as we planned. He was supposed to bring the tv to replace the one the roomie was bringing, but, oh well, he says he's going to bring it this week. We go to the farmer's market and to lunch, and over lunch and some drinks, stuff about the divorce comes up. I get to hear the full range of hate and vehemence he apparently has for my mother and her lawyer, which, wow. It's pretty damn bad. Crying ends up happening, and things are awkward as we go to get the stuff my roomie shorted me. I head back to my apartment shortly thereafter, and manage to get some dishes, laundry, and making some cold cherry soup and creme fraische for today done.

I pass up on hanging out with my dad and some prosecutor friends of his on the terrace, but when they invite me to dinner, for whatever crazy reason, I say yes. I walk in on a fairly rowdy scene; these prosecutors are apparently reliving their college days, and one couple has their very young daughter along. One fairly drunk girl, who later ends up drunkenly paying for all of us, is all over me about Japan, saying how much my dad has talked about me, and is generally overwhelming. As the night goes on, it becomes clearer to me that this may be one of the girls my father may be fucking. Which, wow. I end up leaving after dinner, and my father goes off to a college bar with them.

This morning, I get a text from my dad saying he's lost his car keys. Which means apparently he's stayed in town over night, god only knows where. For a good portion of the morning, his phones are dead, and I can't reach him. When he's finally back in contact, he says a locksmith is coming, and all is well. He apparently just got home, in a completely different car, which means he had to rent something. Why? Who the fuck knows.

So, yeah. I have riesling strawberry ice cubes in the freezer for slushies. That's going to be the rest of tonight. Fuck it.

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What's the best part of having a good day? You're family repeatedly calling you overweight, and a fat bastard. Not that they even know or care about how much stress I am under at the moment, no, their main concern was making themselves feel better, by taking digs at me, and calling everything I do wrong.

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What's the best part of having a good day? You're family repeatedly calling you overweight, and a fat bastard. Not that they even know or care about how much stress I am under at the moment, no, their main concern was making themselves feel better, by taking digs at me, and calling everything I do wrong.

My dad does this. He isn't malicious, he just doesn't realize how it sounds. I sent my mom a picture for Mother's Day with some kids from work holding signs they made for her and the only thing he said was "you put on some weight there haven't you"? I just reply with "you've gotten a little old there haven't you"?

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Man, you need to move to Chicago! There are a lot of crazy women here, no doubt (I've dated some), but, from the sound of things, there are far fewer crazies in the city of Chicago than there are in the entire state of Maryland.

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It's not even a dating thing anymore. Just making friends is way harder than it should be.

Everyone that wants to hang out with me is too young, doing stupid shit that I stopped doing a decade ago (or never did in the first place). Anyone my age wants nothing to do with me. Even if we share one or two common interests, all of the mathematical reasons I'm practically undateable somehow find themselves bleeding into the friend realm and I end up going out to do things with people I can't even stand because they're my only option.

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About 2-3 weeks ago, I get a phone call stating that my credit card has had some fraudulant charges made on it in Maryland. Since I have no let Ohio in over a year, that is indeed an issue. They reissue my card and take care of the purchases I did not make. I am confused about how this would happen as I have not used that card in over six months.

Earlier today, I cannot use my debit card. Turns out, I had a fradulant charge on it in from a Texas Walmart. Again, this is an issue. Again, reissue my card. Now I am left without a card (and since I never have cash, an issue) for 3-5 business days. Went ahead and had my other credit card reissued as if 2/3 have been hit in under a month, I am not taking my chances. Add in the fact I have to cancel all the automatic bill-paying that goes on with the debit card and this is just a massive headache. Really. I have had a massive headache since leaving the bank.

Granted I am not out of any money, but this is just massively pissing my off as I still have no idea when/where/why my card numbers got stolen. I mean, they stay in my wallet and that never leaves my sight. I haven't order anything online in well over a year. So, seriously, what the fuck?

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If you use ATMs, you probably got hit by a skimmer group. They put fake readers over the real ones with a pinhole camera that watches you put in the number. We just had a group come through this area that did that. They stay in one place for awhile, then move on to another state. They sell the info to someone else, and they use the cards in another state to see if they work. You should consider calling the police.

http://www.toledoblade.com/business/2012/06/10/ATM-skimming-crimes-on-rise-as-criminals-refine-techniques.html

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Well, today was unquestionably the shittiest day I've had at work in years. The assholes just came out in DROVES today. I don't know what was in the air today that made so many stupid bitches think they know my job better than I do, but fuck all of them. First off, this moron comes up to the counter with a Western Union receive money form that barely has anything filled out on it and I inform her that I need all of the info filled out or I can't process it. She tells me I'm wrong and that she's been here before and hasn't had to fill out the info. (Aside: if you are SENDING money, then you don't always have to fill a form out. RECEIVING money? ALWAYS have to have a form. Period.) So, I tell her if I don't have all the info, the computer won't let me process it. She says whatever and that she won't argue with me about this. (Ok...) She fills out the information and I process and print her check and I hand it to her and don't say a word. She angrily asks "Aren't you going to tell me where to sign?" First off, it has three lines in plain English where it says "receiver signature". But I just quip back to her, "Well, you said you've been here before." (That felt good.) She goes, "Are you getting smart with me?! Call your manager up here!" I do, while insisting I wasn't being smart with her (even though I was). My manager listens to her bitch for a minute and she leaves. He walks away and comes back up to the desk a few minutes later and asks me what that was all about. I explain everything and we have a good chuckle at the bitch.

Then, later on, I ask a woman for her I.D. for alcohol and she goes on a mini-whining spree about me asking for it. Ok, if you get offended because I ask for your I.D. for alcohol, take it up with the Georgia state government, shut the fuck up, and leave me alone. You're an oversensitive fuckstick and I'm not interested in your whining.

And as a finale to this rant of mine, if you know an extreme couponer who goes into grocery stores like 5 minutes before they close and shops forever with 10,000,000,000 coupons...punch them in the face for me. K thx.

I want to light people on fire.

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And now at the crucial point with the rest of my life in potentia, depression strikes like a big grey smothering blanket. Fuck this noise.

edit- As usual the best way to fight depression is through rage. Queue Vodaphone denying my claim for a replacement handset after the one they sent me broke down. GO BLOW IT OUT YOUR ASS VODAPHONE.

Fucking suckers, I'm going to sell their shitty handset straight back to them and use the money to upgrade when my contract is up.

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Sorry, this is going to be a long, and drawn out post.

Let's say you have had some serious stress related hardships for the past 2-3 years, that have involved you having to repeat your entire final year of your degree, and then someone very close to you, decides to have a very serious emotional breakdown, repeatedly. How repeatedly? About everyday you almost have to talk to them out of committing suicide. Then the next day, when you think you have sorted their issue a little, they come back to you, with the exact same issues as the day before, and you try and help again, but again, overnight, everything has been reset in their minds to go and kill themselves.

Now, let's say, you are really worried about your course, as you are struggling, but rather than being able to help yourself, you have to help your friend, as they have constantly let you know, without you, they would kill themselves. So, you have to take that into account, and try to handle both, but with the mounting pressure of deadlines, trying to hide the fact that you are now repeating a year to your family, who will just castrate you, and say "Nobody else in this family had to repeat. Maybe you should quit this stupid course." and your friend, who everyday contacts you, to let you know, today is the day they will kill themselves, and you spend three hours talking them down from that, realising that tomorrow, no matter what they say it will all start all over again.

Now you have finally convinced this friend that they need to get psychological help, which in the end they do. Now at this point, you expect with all the counselling, and medical support they are being given, they should be getting better, or at the very least, rely on you a little less. Nope, if anything, they drop even more on you. You can't exactly tell them to fuck off, I need to be alone for a minute, as you do not know how close they are to taking all the prescriptions their doctor gave them, and ending it all there and then.

Thanks to all of this, you've now had to fail most of your coursework, as the constant grind of your so called friend dropping their issues on top of you, along with personal things, you cannot take the pressure, and with no one to actually turn to, as your family have shown they don't give a shit about your personal issues, unless it is to dispense such wisdom as "I had it a lot worse, so shut up" you keep everything to yourself, not being able to handle all of the pressures put upon you, you just start to lose confidence in your own life, and the strength to even wake up in the morning, as you just know, the second you wake up, and look at your phone, you'll see about a dozen missed calls or texted messages from your so called friend saying they can't take this stress anymore, or they are having a panic attack. After a while even getting up will start to feel like a chore, with all this dropped on you, and you just revert inward, unable to deal with any of your own problems, as they have balled up into a gigantic hellish ball, that just breaks you down physically and mentally.

At some points you try and speak to your friend and say, "Look, you're really killing me, here. Can I please just be left alone for a bit" which they seem to listen to, and not even a day passes before the person comes back and drops everything on you, but now adding the line "I know you have your own issues, and I should leave you to it." Which forces you, for some dumb reason to put aside your own things, no matter how often they say this, you just constantly have to help them. And you'll get no reward, or recognition for it, everyday, it seems, this person just reverts back to 0 with any supposed progress you've made.

Now let's say you look and feel terrible constantly, your family is supposed to know you so well, that even looking awful will get them to try and speak to you, or shown concern? Not in this instance. The only comments you get from family is "You have gained a serious amount of weight" or your dad mocking you and saying "Oh, it's so stressful, my life's so stressful" in a mocking tone, before repeating what others have said about weight gain.

You can't turn to other people, as your parents have let it be known, that no one can really help you with your troubles, and it's better to keep to yourself, then speak to others. A stupid idea, but every time you have opened up to someone, it's brought nothing buy misery to your life, and a reminder from your parents, that speaking to others about your problems, shows weakness.

Also, whenever you try and speak to someone about your issues, you are met with the constant response of "You think you have it bad, I've got..." which just drives you further and further into yourself, looking for answers that are just not there.

Now, let's say it's Saturday, and you just got a text from the person, saying they cannot take the pressure anymore. It doesn't matter that, thanks to them, it takes you a while to get up in the morning, or even have the energy to do anything, or you are now seeing all your hopes and dreams burn down before your eyes. You now, along with serious anxiety, lack of energy to do work, and severe panic attacks, have to constantly talk someone out of killing themselves every day, and knowing, no matter what you say, they are going to be back tomorrow with the same issues. And if you say anything wrong to them, or ignore them, you are going to be the cause of them killing themselves. Leaving you, totally fucked when it comes to your own life.

I have to live with this, along with my own stressful issues, such as re-submitting coursework, one of which I've been told there's no chance of getting done, without repeating the class a third time, and constant headaches, and just feeling of worthlessness in that I am the person who's been tasked with helping this person get help, and no matter what I do, it all reverts back to 0. It's like a form of madness that is draining the very life out of me, I now cannot even check any messages on my phone, without wondering when the next text from this person, saying they are feeling suicidal is.

It's gotten so bad, that I cannot continue with whatever I was doing, without seeing if this person has texted me, and if they are planning suicide at that moment, as I just feel, the longer I leave it, the better chance that I could have their death on my hands.

Sorry, I really needed to get this off of my chest.

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Austen, honey, there comes a time when you have to put your foot down. And this is one of them. You have done literally everything you can do for this other person. They have professional help. You don't have to stop cold turkey, but don't respond to them as much. Let them know that this is going to happen. But you need to take care of yourself.

And you can reach out to help. Have you ever considered seeing someone yourself?

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Austen, honey, there comes a time when you have to put your foot down. And this is one of them. You have done literally everything you can do for this other person. They have professional help. You don't have to stop cold turkey, but don't respond to them as much. Let them know that this is going to happen. But you need to take care of yourself.

And you can reach out to help. Have you ever considered seeing someone yourself?

Yeah, to be honest, I can probably deal with whatever is going in my life, I just need some time to focus on it, and deal with it. I am getting help from my GP, and that's all I need right now, just some time to deal with my own problems.

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I say ween her off of you. Respond later on in the day. I am trying to say this in the least heartless way possible but this sound more like "I want attention" than "i will kill myself." Honestly, they need long term professional help. She needs to commit herself honestly. She's obviously a danger to herself and she obviously doesn't care that she's killing you.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Went to the dentist today. On top of finding out I have what amounts to my first two cavities (I don't count the ones that developed in my wisdom teeth below the gum line), I also discovered that one of the fake teeth I got installed up front after my root canal is decayed to the point that it will likely fall out at any given time.

I need oral surgery to have a titanium bar drilled into my upper jaw bone and then another fake tooth capped to that. On top of THAT lovely little bit of $3000 dollar news I can't afford, it turns out I'll be able to pay for the whole thing in two installments becase the titanium bar needs to heal for 4-6 months before a tooth can be put in. 6 months missing a front tooth to add insult to injury.

As someone who has always taken care of my teeth, this is plunging me into another goddamn depression like the one I got into after the accident that made me get the root canal in the first place.

All the fucking booze please.

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I travel a couple of hours to get to my Dad's place in Devon for a short three-day break by the sea, and the second I arrive the most miserable cold sets in. Totally ruined these few days already, I'm going to spend them in bed watching netflix and I honestly could have done that at home.

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This morning, as I was finishing up my jog, a young woman and her ankle-biting dog walked towards me. I moved over a little bit to let them pass, because I'm not one of those runners who believes I should have the entire sidewalk. She responded by loosening the slack on the leash, allowing the dog to rush towards me.

At this point, we're so close that even if I had stopped, someone was going to get hurt. So I had to make a split-second decision: kick the dog by accident, sidestep onto uneven rocks, or jump over the dog. I sort of went with a sidestep / jump combo, but as soon as I landed, I turned around (but kept jogging), and yelled, "Seriously?!"

To this, she stopped, swung her head in my direction, and sneered like a fucking petulant child.

Slowly, I shook my head while glaring at her, but went on with my run.

If she pulls the same shit again, she's going to get a major piece of my mind. Not only did she try to trip me with the leash, she was going to let her dog nip at me. Worse, she gave no mind to the fact that I could have seriously injured myself to get out of her way, or that, had I not done so in time, I would have punted her football-sized dog right in the face.

As I grow older, I'm seriously starting to see why people in their 40s and beyond have such a disdain for anyone under 30.

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