Bait 3-D

[Chadzilla]

If you are at all like me, then you may have asked yourself at one point, “What would it be like to be trapped inside of a flooded supermarket that is attacked by pack of hungry sharks?”

Oh, you haven’t asked yourself that question? Then I guess we aren’t all that alike, then.

But you know who is? Russell Mulcahy, the acclaimed director of Razorback, Highlander 1 & 2, and Resident Evil: Extinction, that’s who. He’s signed on to make Bait 3-D, a soon to be filmed thriller about a group of people who become trapped inside of a supermarket and are then menaced by a psychotic bandit. But it gets worse! The group becomes further trapped when a freak tsunami floods the area and in swoops a pack of hungry tiger sharks eager to check out the menu in the now underwater neighborhood.

Folks, this is what happens when you smoke too much weed while watching old discs of Jaws 3-D and Intruder back to back. Dude, where’s my Syfy movie?

[Dread]

and yet Pirahna 3D sounds like a good idea to you?

[Chadzilla]

and yet Pirahna 3D sounds like a good idea to you?

Hmm, have I ever posted that Piranha 3-D sounded good? Let me check my posting on that subject.

Nope, no such comment on that thread. What I said about that film was:

Hopefully it will be a big piece of the gooey cheese that is heavy on the tomato sauce.

Not a strong statement of quality, that. My hope is to enjoy Piranha 3-D on the level of shoddy B-movie, which is all the original was, and I adore the original. From what I have read, the director is quite open about the film being an over the top horror-comedy (although, from some reports, the piranhas themselves aren't funny, the attacks are rather intense, in fact) and meant as nothing more than a diverting entertainment. Fine.

I will also gleefully put down cash to see Bait 3-D, though that strikes me as being a DOA flick. Difference? My monster geek sense tingles with Piranha 3-D. It's telling me to kick back and laugh with the movie. My monster geek sense goes WTF!?! with Bait 3-D, but the Siren Song of Crap is strong when a movie sounds like Deep Blue Sea set in an underwater Wal-Mart. My sense is telling me I will laugh AT the movie. Big difference.

But both are monster movies, so I am there. I always show up for the monsters.