Episode 425

[Stavros]

Ok, now that I've seen ALL the Saw movies I decided to go through ALL the Earth-2.net reviews as well. Got even more out of this all second time around, it's been a tremendous effort by so many people to cover this BS and I greatly appreciate it. And hey, if you're well and truly done and the next Saw movie does come out I will quite happily step up to cover it for the site.

[SuaveStar]

Ok, now that I've seen ALL the Saw movies I decided to go through ALL the Earth-2.net reviews as well. Got even more out of this all second time around, it's been a tremendous effort by so many people to cover this BS and I greatly appreciate it. And hey, if you're well and truly done and the next Saw movie does come out I will quite happily step up to cover it for the site.

Please for the love of god, if they make another Saw movie, I want to be a co-host with Stavros.

[dc20willsave]

Ok, now that I've seen ALL the Saw movies I decided to go through ALL the Earth-2.net reviews as well. Got even more out of this all second time around, it's been a tremendous effort by so many people to cover this BS and I greatly appreciate it. And hey, if you're well and truly done and the next Saw movie does come out I will quite happily step up to cover it for the site.

Please for the love of god, if they make another Saw movie, I want to be a co-host with Stavros.

Seconded! You need the odd American out also and since we've established I'm the Anti-Suavestar, I might find something enjoyable about it. I can feel my soul wilting already at the thought.

[Guest]

The whole point of the episode is that we, as in the entire site, were done with Saw.

[Molly]

And if there is a benevolent force in the universe, so is the rest of the world.

[SuaveStar]

Ok, now that I've seen ALL the Saw movies I decided to go through ALL the Earth-2.net reviews as well. Got even more out of this all second time around, it's been a tremendous effort by so many people to cover this BS and I greatly appreciate it. And hey, if you're well and truly done and the next Saw movie does come out I will quite happily step up to cover it for the site.

Please for the love of god, if they make another Saw movie, I want to be a co-host with Stavros.

Seconded! You need the odd American out also and since we've established I'm the Anti-Suavestar, I might find something enjoyable about it. I can feel my soul wilting already at the thought.

Well, I want to pitch a podcast with us three discussing films for a podcast, if Saw is off the table.

Also, Dubs, I made it just past the stupid drug/antidote mini-game that had you play by luck before I call it quits, how far did you get?

I wouldn't say it was a game to play only for achievements, but I wouldn't say it was the worst game I'd ever played either (TNA style earns that right) but I would say that Saw fans, would probably enjoy it for what it is. A mindless game, that if bothering, can be completed in about four hours.

The TNA analogy was spot on in the review. I must say.

[Koete]

Well, I want to pitch a podcast with us three discussing films for a podcast, if Saw is off the table.

I can see it now.

Episode 1 - The Godfather

Stavros: One of the finest films ever made.

dc20willsave: A film anyone who loves film should see.

Suavestar: It was okay, but nothing special.

[Guest]

Also, Dubs, I made it just past the stupid drug/antidote mini-game that had you play by luck before I call it quits, how far did you get?

Not too much further after that. It just repeats everything after that point.

[Molly]

I honestly loved this whole fucking episode with all my fucking heart. My only complaint is that I won't ever hear Earth-2's resident horror guy bitch about Saw.

[George W.]

...but Dubs was on the show.

[Molly]

[James D.]

[Missy]

Something dawned on me over the weekend: In the first film, what was Zep's so-called crime? As far as I can recall, on his tape, Jigsaw never said what the man did wrong. Jigsaw simply poisoned the kind, friendly orderly to get him to torture Dr. Gordon's family.

[Koete]

Zep ate Jigsaw's jello when he thought Jigsaw was asleep.

[Missy]

Fucking bastard!

[Molly]

Jello related crime is the number two cause of death in the Saw universe, behind the crooked insurance companies.

[Koete]

Number three is littering.

[SuaveStar]

Number three is littering.

Four is farting in church.

[Venneh]

Five is looking at women other than your significant other. Not ogling them, just looking at them.

[George W.]

Zepp was stealing morphine for personal use, I believe.

[Stavros]

Zepp was stealing morphine for personal use, I believe.

Well sure, if you want to ruin our fun with facts.

[Koete]

Zepp was stealing jello for personal use, I believe. Sweet, sweet jello.

[SuaveStar]

Edit: I'm going to just post my thoughts on the film as well as I make my way through it.

Bit of a bump, but I'm sitting down to watch the film. And I want to bring up some points that you guys mentioned in the actual review for the show.

With the opening death scene, you spoke about it like it was something strange, and made it seem like this was a makeshift set up for the stage. I would like to argue for the film and say that in the background they had painted sets, and mannequins dressed up like lumberjacks, so it could have looked like a dressing for a department store, as it seemed to be a mall setting they were in, so it could be justified as to why nobody looked at the place twice, as it could have just been a store front, and also the girl was hidden from view, and the two jackasses were out cold for the most part.

Bro's before hos does pretty much sum up that scene in about three words though, I'll agree with that.

Also, even though a girl was being sawn in half, people still kept their camera phones out and didn't disperse, acting as if it was street theatre. Which again, would justify why nobody thought anything of the scene. It could have been interpreted as street theatre to get people to go to some shitty shop opening.

Why the fuck did we have to see her intestines fall to the ground though, that was just fucking awful, for the sake of being awful.

Every scene after the opener feels like it's a bad TV movie from the 90's, along the lines of the Robocop TV show, or Jack Frost 2: Revenge of the mutant killer snowman (Yes, it is real, and yes it is fucking awful)

The shitty Jill dream scene, was so fucking horrible, and the death was so fucking stupid and fake. Hoffman's line "The only problem with killing you....I can only do it once" before he drives a train through her. Why didn't he just torture her first, if he wanted to make her suffer. And how did she know he had sown his face up. The last she saw of him, he was holding his face, and the fucking left side was peeling off. How would she know he had been able to sow it up. I know that's nitpicking, but still. He should have had the peeling face in the dream. I've seen TV shows doing nightmare scenes that look more realistic than the shit this film did.

Why did they feel the need to show the girl dying in the garage death from two different angles. I get it, you're proud of your shitty watermelon smashing and how it looked. But it looks so fucking cheap when you show the same shot over and over again. And wouldn't have had more impact if they had let the driver live? Instead of a pointless and shitty death.

The fans death, I couldn't have been the only person who thought of gladiators and the hang tough game.

Flashback time! And how do we know it's a flashback? Because our "Hero" has unkempt hair.

Does anyone else think the agent/best friend of the "Hero/Book guy" is the rundown version of Tim Roth? If you wanted to hire a Tim Roth impersonator to do a party you would call this guy.

The bookstore scene, where Dubs mentions how if someone stood for too long they'd be asked to leave, I can sort of attempt to justify now. Let's say the store is run by idiots, and they only have one person running the signing, that one person was speaking to people waiting in line and making sure that everyone kept in an orderly line. I'm pretty sure that the line was to the right, and Jigsaw came in from the left out of nowhere though, so it kind of makes me wonder what the fuck.

Also, to justify Mike's thing, when you said that the book would have had to have been advertised as soon as it came out. Maybe this is a follow up book, on his life after the last book. Motivational speakers release more than one book, and they did mention in the film how the publicist has been lying for Bobby for years.

The eye gouging looked fucking ridiculous.

"We only have ten seconds to do this right....so I'm going to count to three." Worst. Death. Ever.

Hoffman relied on being incredibly jammy. That is fucking bullshit. How was he supposed to know they'd all go out, and leave him enough time to change the bodies, he fucking didn't. Jammy doesn't work if you're a super-villain.

What a crappy ending. It was so crappy, I spent the last ten minutes wondering which Saw was worse, this one, or 6 which had no real story. I realised that this had even less of a story, and the over the top, fucking childish violence made it a lot worse.

I can understand how people can enjoy the first 4 (Maybe 5) Saw films, but this film was just a big fuck you to everyone. It was so pointless, and left nothing for you to want to watch the film again. And in a way, it backwards taints the rest of the films in the series, by taking all of them, and making you know that this film is linked to them all.

However, we are sent back to where we started, and the film has ended. And that is that.

Edited January 25, 2011 by SuaveStar

[Missy]

With the opening death scene, you spoke about it like it was something strange, and made it seem like this was a makeshift set up for the stage. I would like to argue for the film and say that in the background they had painted sets, and mannequins dressed up like lumberjacks, so it could have looked like a dressing for a department store, as it seemed to be a mall setting they were in, so it could be justified as to why nobody looked at the place twice, as it could have just been a store front, and also the girl was hidden from view, and the two jackasses were out cold for the most part.

Good point. But still, when did Hoffman have time to set it up?

And how did she know he had sown his face up. The last she saw of him, he was holding his face, and the fucking left side was peeling off. How would she know he had been able to sow it up. I know that's nitpicking, but still. He should have had the peeling face in the dream. I've seen TV shows doing nightmare scenes that look more realistic than the shit this film did.

Another great point.

The fans death, I couldn't have been the only person who thought of gladiators and the hang tough game.

I actually mentioned this during the review, but it was edited out due to bad audio, if I recall.

Also, to justify Mike's thing, when you said that the book would have had to have been advertised as soon as it came out. Maybe this is a follow up book, on his life after the last book. Motivational speakers release more than one book, and they did mention in the film how the publicist has been lying for Bobby for years.

Nope, it's the same book. Their timeline is fucked up.

[SuaveStar]

With the opening death scene, you spoke about it like it was something strange, and made it seem like this was a makeshift set up for the stage. I would like to argue for the film and say that in the background they had painted sets, and mannequins dressed up like lumberjacks, so it could have looked like a dressing for a department store, as it seemed to be a mall setting they were in, so it could be justified as to why nobody looked at the place twice, as it could have just been a store front, and also the girl was hidden from view, and the two jackasses were out cold for the most part.

Good point. But still, when did Hoffman have time to set it up?

I would say, that this was set during lunch time, so I would say early morning, and to steal something from Dexter, he uses a drug that knocks the person out for several hours, which means he could take them to the killing spot, tie them down, and set the scene. For this, Hoffman could have set the scene up a day in advance, kidnapped the people and set it all up. Hoffman is a cop, so he would have access to information from doctors on what drugs to use to keep someone unconscious for several hours at a time. Like anasthetic.

Another idea, is that he hired people to set the scene up for him, at the end of the film, he was shown with a bag of money, and as a cop, he would know where to find people who would work for cash, no questions asked. They could have set up the trap, and Hoffman could have just shown up with the victims.

Also, to justify Mike's thing, when you said that the book would have had to have been advertised as soon as it came out. Maybe this is a follow up book, on his life after the last book. Motivational speakers release more than one book, and they did mention in the film how the publicist has been lying for Bobby for years.

Nope, it's the same book. Their timeline is fucked up.

Then there is no justifying that one. Except that maybe seeing as there was no crowds, and the set was pretty basic, that this was a local talk show he was doing at the end of the book tour, that could have gone on for a while. I was wondering why there was only twelve people watching the interview and the set was so cheap looking. That could be a way to justify why there's such a time delay between him doing an interview and the conversation with Jigsaw. Cause local TV would be way down the totem pole of people to talk to.

One thing that annoyed me, they never explained how he got the markings on his chest from the hooks originally. He never says what they were really, or how he got them.