Avengers Draft


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Metallic hallways. Why does everything always have to have metallic hallways, Carol thought.

More robots. So many robots.

"Who dares try to conquer Doom!"


Layla fired her big ass gun. The Doombot fell.

"That's the problem with this line of Doombot. There's a kink in the vocal phrases," she explained to her teammates.

The Doombot's head twitched. "Curse that Sue Storm!"


After some more robots, so many robots. Victor wondered if it was technically a hatecrime to kill so many robots but then he saw one that both he and Janet had not wanted to see.


"Look, the disappointment of my electronic loins and the bride of my pathetic excuse for a creator! How I loathe your continued existences. Ultron-14 shall enjoy ripping the very mortality from your very veins as you feel how inferior you are to a truly great being su-"

Ultron started smoking as everyone blasted it at the same time and Hercules uppercutted it's head off. He looked back at them.

"Thou needed to halt it's speaking!" He said, shrugging.

Everyone nodded. Victor looked at Janet. "So, does that mean you're technically my Grandma?"

"Carol, you owe me an extra couple of drinks after this is all done," Janet said.

"I know a place," Layla offered.

"Hercules will join you!"

"And I thought I had complicated Thanksgiving dinners," Billy rubbed his temples.

Rhodey was about to add something when the giant dough monsters attacked. Everyone looked at each other.

"Zola!" they said in unison.


Arnim Zola is a criminal and technological mastermind who just happens to like projecting himself from the stomach of robots. He can control he genetic creations using radio waves and other robots as well.

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This was a tough one, but I ultimately went with the Symbiotes.


After recruiting Eugene "Flash" Thompson, a.k.a. "Agent Venom", the powers that be at SWORD sought to create more Symbiote-enhanced soldiers and lured or captured several specimens, incarcerated them separately, and attempted to make them controlled killing machines like the one worn by Thompson. However, they broke free, wiped out everyone working at the Peak, started breeding like mad, then turned to Earth for hosts and prey.

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The echoes of lingering curses caked the walls of the laboratory. A man in whited paced, speaking into a telephone. He wasn't screaming, but in this situation, his tone let you a know a lesser man would be. He was Dr. Nemesis.

Dr. Nemesis: No, I know you don't understand. You see, you're a moron. And I'm a genius!

The voice on the phone shouted back, slightly muffled. Nemesis took great offense to whatever was said, and reached for a pair of pistols lying on his counter.

Dr. Nemesis: Do you know how many clones of Hitler I've killed? Fifteen! And now, I'm coming for you! I hope you're proud of yourself!

He slammed the phone down and headed for the door, packing his personalized tranquilizer pistols (of science).

Dr. Nemesis: I've never had a pizza delivery service be so rude!

The high pitched whine began, and Dr. Nemesis evaporated into thin air with a pop.


Imagine if Warren Ellis had a baby with Hunter S. Thompson, for science. That baby is Dr. Nemesis. He's armed to the teeth with science and he's been killing Nazis for 70 years.

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The Thing, Hawkeye, Ares, Siryn and Dr. Nemesis all popped into existence in a grand white hall. Ares saw Hawkeye, armed with his bow and charged.

Ares: No more tricks!

The God of War swung his axe, Hawkeye rolled to the side, The Thing grabbed the blade mid-swing.

Thing; Slow yer roll, Gimli. We ain't in danger.

Ares: Silence, Golem! Ares has no time for you!

Patsy Walker-Hellstrom popped into existence in the grand hall. She turned to the window, and out among the stars, she saw the earth hanging above white dunes of sand, and she gasped. Hawkeye saw her and instantly recognized her.

Hawkeye: Hellcat?

Breathlessly, Hellcat spoke.

Hellcat; We're on the moon.


Patsy Walker is a master martial artist, with some latent psionic powers. She's also married to the Son of Satan and has been a long time member of the Defenders. Not bad for someone who started her life as a bad ripoff of Betty and Veronica.

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