Round 4: Robbie Gould v Philip Stuckey


Missy
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The Douchies  

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Who: Robbie Gould

Actor: Max Cantor

Movie: Dirty Dancing

Douche move(s): Cheats on his girlfriend, gets someone pregnant, and ignores those responsibilities with relish.

Who: Philip Stuckey

Actor: Jason Alexander

Movie: Pretty Woman

Douche move(s): Attempts to rape someone.

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This is kinda tough but I'm going with Robbie. I'm doing this for one reason: Stuckey is completely destroyed at the end of the movie and could conceivably be remorseful over what he did based off of his reaction as he leaves at the end. Robbie on the other hand, sure, he's not going to get to pay for medical school but he shows no signs of being an even remotely improved person. He is going to continue to be a douche bag and, just based off of facial reactions, he doesn't get why things stopped going his way.

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Let's be honest, Robbie is a hair's breadth from raping someone, if he hasn't already. Being a young, rich, white male in the 1960s, he truly believes the world belongs to him, and that includes all of the woman on it. He's an awful human being who doesn't understand right from wrong, because he's been raised to believe he can't do wrong. Everybody that isn't in his social class is beneath him; they're dirt, no matter their virtues. For example, Johnny Castle (still one of the best cinematic names ever) is a working-class nobody, but he puts himself on the line to clean up Robbie's business. And does he get Robbie's thanks or admiration? No. Hell, I don't even think Robbie knows or cares who fixed things for him -- outside of Dr. Houseman paying for the abortion, of course. And that's the point; he only cares about the money, not the people who suffered at his hand or helped him through it.

That said, I believe Philip Stuckey was a Robbie Gould in his youth. That's evident by his cheating ways, the social circle in which he finds himself, the way he reacts when he doesn't get his way (RE: like he's never been told no), and the way he treats Vivian. The exact moment he learns she's a hooker, he sees her as nothing more than scum, but scum he can fuck because he truly believes she's nothing more than a whore. Like Robbie, he never tries to get to know anyone deemed beneath him, to see her virtues; all he sees is the lower social class she's from and treats her accordingly -- by his rules. Then he tries to rape her. Not just to have power over her, mind you, but to seek revenge on Edward. He's finally been told no in his life, and he reacts like a child; it's the "if I can't get what I want, then I'll break what's yours" mentality of a spoiled brat. That fact that he's so quick to resort to such an act also heavily informs the character; he's done this before, but there was no one to stop him then. Even if that assumption is wrong, even if he hasn't raped before, he crossed the line from not caring about those he sees as lower class to downright treating them like their lives mean nothing. Worst of all, I don't think Stuckey learned anything. He'll move away from LA, to New York or Chicago or another big city, and this cycle will start anew.

Robbie is truly horrible, but on some level you can hope he sees the error of his ways in the coming years. Stuckey is in his 30s, he's a grown man that has never and will never learn life's Number One Rule (RE: Be excellent to each other), and that is why he gets my vote this round.

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I'm nulling because I've not seen either film, but the reviews seemed to imply (to me at least; I apologise if the following is misconstrued on my part) that Stuckey attempted rape out of sheer spite from what happened in the film, whereas Robbie was oblivious to his actions having grave consequences and learned nothing. I agree that rape is certainly the bigger sin, but Robbie simply sounds like the bigger douche based upon his all-round personality.

Again though, I haven't seen either film so that train of thought could easily picked apart and I'm not going to defend it were that to happen.

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This, Gentlemen, is why I married my husband. Eloquent, noble, chivalrous, whip-smart and so pretty (that last qualification came as a perk). He's also right: Robbie waves the vinegar flag at full mast, but Stuckey, Stuckey tries to stake it in the ground. Stuckey, you are old. You are a lawyer. You are the epitome of sleaze and have had a lifetime of experience (probably preying on the weak) to learn something. Robbie will inevitably get his ass kicked at college not only by the real boys there, but because the feminist revolution is about to start, he's in for some good learnin'.

Stuckey, who lives and works well after the feminist rev, has apparently not received the memo. Hey, shithead, women don't respond well to unsubstantiated advances. Not even women who, in his view, are beneath him socially. Stuckey, you're almost 40 and I can smell your inferiority complex well into the next century. Men who behave like children have my vote, hands down.

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I saw Pretty Woman for the first time last night before voting on this and ultimately have to go with Stuckey, largely because nothing Robbie does on-screen is as irredeemable as rape. Also, he's a married man who shamelessly ogles over other women in front of his own wife.

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The only defence for Stuckey is the fact that he knows that she's a prostitute and therefore believes that she will put out because that's her job, but by the time that comes around in the film he knows/should know that she's very much changed her mind career wise. Plus he has a wife. Forshame.

There's no telling whether Robbie's sexual conquest was consensual or not but the issue in Dirty Dancing is the aftermath, not the event. While Stuckey is the definitely the bigger douche in my eyes (I'm voting Stuckey - rape is not good) I'm glad that Robbie at least got this far. This asshole impregnated someone using his perceived superiority, refuses to acknowledge the pregnancy that he has caused and has learned and regrets NOTHING by the end of the film.

This is the douche-baggery that is deserving of Round 4 of the Douchies, and if you have a play-off vote (losers from the semi-finals to determine 3rd place) I'd be hard pressed to choose between this cock-juggling thunder-cunt, a war hungry tyrant or a manipulative military official.

I hate Robbie.

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This one was really hard because Robbie is one of the worst, all time douches. Remember that moment when pulls out his copy of The Fountainhead and tells baby "Some people count, some people don't"? Total douche move. But he's still a kid--this is his summer job to pay his college tuition, right?

But Stuckey? He's an adult. He's old enough to have a functioning moral compass. And instead, when he gets angry with Vivian, he reacts by attempting to rape her as punishment. And he would have, if Edward hadn't busted in. Seriously, fuck that guy.

Stuckey wins this round.

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