Missy Posted April 13, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 13, 2008 Jen and I went out for dinner this evening, and here are two choice bits I picked up. While we were waiting for our table, two people discussed other restaurants in the area: "Panda Express? What kind of food do they have?" "Chinese. Asian. Oriental. All that." Once seated, someone at the table next to ours asked the server, "Do those mashed potatoes have gravy? 'Cause I can't digest cheese." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James D. Posted April 13, 2008 Report Share Posted April 13, 2008 Jesus Christ, that cheese line is GOLD. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missy Posted May 1, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 While discussing a story about Bugsy Siegel, someone asked the author, "What kind of mobster was he? Was he in the mafia?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dread Posted May 1, 2008 Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 Someone asked me what the best movie ever made was and I said Jaws. They laughed and said that it sucked. I asked what they thought was the best movie ever made and they said Zoolander. Zoolander! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Posted May 1, 2008 Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 Someone asked me what the best movie ever made was and I said Jaws. They laughed and said that it sucked. I asked what they thought was the best movie ever made and they said Zoolander. Zoolander! Were you volunteering in some sort of state-run hospital at the time? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dread Posted May 1, 2008 Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 Someone asked me what the best movie ever made was and I said Jaws. They laughed and said that it sucked. I asked what they thought was the best movie ever made and they said Zoolander. Zoolander! Were you volunteering in some sort of state-run hospital at the time? It was a high school student. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Posted May 1, 2008 Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 Someone asked me what the best movie ever made was and I said Jaws. They laughed and said that it sucked. I asked what they thought was the best movie ever made and they said Zoolander. Zoolander! Were you volunteering in some sort of state-run hospital at the time? It was a high school student. Same thing, really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 1, 2008 Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 A few weeks ago, my girlfriend stayed after Japanese class at UV to help the students that aren't as far along as her (which would be, well, everyone). As expected, a vast majority of these students are just anime fans that will literally cosplay every single day and clearly have no actual interest in learning the language. These are (supposed) adults in their 20s, I'll remind you. Anyways, there was this one mouth-breather that pretty much spent all day doodling. Amy, being remarkably more tolerant than myself went over and asked him what he was drawing. In his best non self-aware mix of Comic Book Guy and Napoleon Dynamite he spit out. "It's a Croctapus. Duh!" A croctapus, she was told, is apparently a cross between a crocodile and an octopus. I must find this creature. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missy Posted May 1, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 This was an adult, not a small child or hormonal teen? Is this what he was drawing? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 1, 2008 Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 No, this was somehow an eight armed crocodile of sorts. Amy's a damn talented artist and even she couldn't reproduce the sheer absurdity of it. It was, technically, an adult. Granted, it's Baltimore University, so the bar isn't really up there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fat DJ Posted May 12, 2008 Report Share Posted May 12, 2008 The other day at work two young (like 15-16 year old girls) walk by and I heard "so we were in his bedroom sitting on his bed, and he leaned in so I leaned in too. Then he kissed me and I was like Ewwww! You're my cousin". I was laughing so hard I missed the next part. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Posted May 12, 2008 Report Share Posted May 12, 2008 I think we have a winner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missy Posted May 12, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 12, 2008 The other day at work two young (like 15-16 year old girls) walk by and I heard "so we were in his bedroom sitting on his bed, and he leaned in so I leaned in too. Then he kissed me and I was like Ewwww! You're my cousin". I was laughing so hard I missed the next part. Wait, I need more details. Cousin by blood or marriage? :angel: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Posted May 12, 2008 Report Share Posted May 12, 2008 The other day at work two young (like 15-16 year old girls) walk by and I heard "so we were in his bedroom sitting on his bed, and he leaned in so I leaned in too. Then he kissed me and I was like Ewwww! You're my cousin". I was laughing so hard I missed the next part. Wait, I need more details. Cousin by blood or marriage? :angel: Because a cousin by marriage isn't awkward or weird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missy Posted May 12, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 12, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fat DJ Posted May 18, 2008 Report Share Posted May 18, 2008 Dude, she was like 15, so it wasn't like her cousin in law. She kissed her cousin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missy Posted May 18, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 18, 2008 All joking aside, the cousin could have been from someone's previous marriage. For instance, a girl I knew in high school had sex with her stepfather's nephew. That's the kind of cousin by marriage I was referring to, not it being her husband's cousin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fat DJ Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 That's still pretty fucked up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackFetch Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 That's still pretty fucked up. and yet awesome at the same time. To quote Randal Graves: "Chicks these days are up for anything" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackFetch Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 Last night I overheard two ladies leaving a Christian bible study. This is what was said: "So that's why the Jews are so successful. I thought it was just because they are God's chosen people." I really want to know what the first part of that conversation was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 "Look, I don't care who she sleeps with, but that horse is mine!" Overheard cellphone conversation at work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 Last night I overheard two ladies leaving a Christian bible study. This is what was said: "So that's why the Jews are so successful. I thought it was just because they are God's chosen people." I really want to know what the first part of that conversation was. I am in TEARS. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dread Posted June 2, 2008 Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 "Why should I read 1984? It was written, like, 10 years before I was born!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missy Posted June 2, 2008 Author Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doug Posted June 2, 2008 Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 Thats a pretty good line Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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