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The Master

Every Film You've Watched in 2019

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The Voices/Turkey Shoot: reviews forthcoming

Framed: feature for the festival.

Features: 3

Shorts: 0

Documentaries: 0

Rewatches: 0

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Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory: It's a good first movie of the year.

Sorry to Bother You: The fact that this isn't in all the current reward talks is a damn shame. Subversive, hilarious, and poignant as all hell!

Mac and Me/Atlantic Rim: I'm starting to watch through the new season of Mst3k. It's hitting the marks.

Films: 2
MST3K/Rifftrax Assisted: 2

 

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Rocky II: Nowhere near as good as the original, if only because the pacing is off. The first 30 minutes attempts to cram months into minutes, blowing past all of the major life events Rocky and Adrian accomplish together. The next 40 minutes is okay, in that it shows Rocky's struggle to accept life as a normal person, but it's mostly boring. The movie only comes to life when Adrian comes out of the coma and tells Rocky to win.

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9 hours ago, The Master said:

Rocky II: Nowhere near as good as the original, if only because the pacing is off. The first 30 minutes attempts to cram months into minutes, blowing past all of the major life events Rocky and Adrian accomplish together. The next 40 minutes is okay, in that it shows Rocky's struggle to accept life as a normal person, but it's mostly boring. The movie only comes to life when Adrian comes out of the coma and tells Rocky to win.

I enjoy it more than the original.

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Rocky III: fuck this was fun. I don't want to be the "Rocky was the worst movie in the series" guy because I know I've seen Rocky V and it's garbage but this movie is fun as fuck. 1. Carl Weathers in 1982 is 100% body goals. 2. Burgess Meredith gives his best and final performance as Mickey. 3. Mr. T as Clubber Lang almost makes this a fucking monster movie, he's so badass. 4. Hulk Hogan's greatest wrestling match ever is in this movie and 5. Creed comes back as a force of brotherhood which is brilliant and only a little homoerotic.

Features: 4

Shorts: 0

Documentaries: 0

Rewatches: 0

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^Just a little?!

 

On 1/5/2019 at 9:07 AM, The Master said:

Rocky II: Nowhere near as good as the original, if only because the pacing is off. The first 30 minutes attempts to cram months into minutes, blowing past all of the major life events Rocky and Adrian accomplish together. The next 40 minutes is okay, in that it shows Rocky's struggle to accept life as a normal person, but it's mostly boring. The movie only comes to life when Adrian comes out of the coma and tells Rocky to win.

Concur'd

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Tremors: A Cold Day in Hell: review forthcoming

The Night Comes For Us: I'll probably talk about this in action movie month, but holy shit. This was a gorier extension of The Raid. Man, those Indonesian martial arts films are sick to a degree that I am impressed.

Features: 6

Shorts: 0

Documentaries: 0

Rewatches: 0

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Brian Regan Nunchuks and Flamethrowers: performance films are documentaries on my count. Once upon a time, Brian Regan was the funniest man alive. I sat through half of this and decided to smoke a bowl, but, even then, only a couple belly laughs and the rest was peppered with a few chuckles. This was not up to snuff for him. Kind of sad, actually. Then I saw the trailer for his Netflix show and thought it was hilarious. What the fuck is going on?

Features: 6

Shorts: 0

Documentaries: 1

Rewatches: 0

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On 1/6/2019 at 12:06 AM, Dread said:

Rocky III: fuck this was fun. I don't want to be the "Rocky was the worst movie in the series" guy because I know I've seen Rocky V and it's garbage but this movie is fun as fuck. 1. Carl Weathers in 1982 is 100% body goals. 2. Burgess Meredith gives his best and final performance as Mickey. 3. Mr. T as Clubber Lang almost makes this a fucking monster movie, he's so badass. 4. Hulk Hogan's greatest wrestling match ever is in this movie and 5. Creed comes back as a force of brotherhood which is brilliant and only a little homoerotic.

Rocky III: It's been at least 30 years since I've seen this one straight through, and holy fuck is this good. Rocky is literally my favorite movie of all time. Its story about a guy from nowhere getting an impossible shot and running with it, learning he can't win but can prove himself to the world -- and himself -- is perfectly told. Rocky III, though, takes the same character and shows how much he's grown and changed over the last four-ish years, and does it in a tight-as-fuck 95 minutes. Everyone is at the top of their games, even Talia Shire who finally gets something to do in one of these movies besides looking concerned. She's also amazingly hot during the brief moment when she's washing her hair in the hotel. And speaking of hot: Carl Weathers! Goddamn, that man is cut from stone. (Hell, the camera even takes some time to linger on his dick during one of the running scenes, because even the camera can't contain itself while looking at Apollo.) Pauly's racism I could absolutely do without, but it makes sense for the character and shows how much he's grown by the end of the film. But eh, I don't like it. And Des is spot on: Clubber is a literal monster. Sure, Thunderlips is a beast, but it's an act with him. He's a carny. Clubber's anger and power and determination is all him. Perfect performance, especially the chilling fourth wall break: "Pain."

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Confession time: I’ve lived in Philadelphia for nearly five years now and have passed Rocky’s statue in front of the art museum hundreds of times but haven’t seen single Rocky film.

Forgive me Master for I have sinned.

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2 hours ago, The Master said:

Rocky III: It's been at least 30 years since I've seen this one straight through, and holy fuck is this good. Rocky is literally my favorite movie of all time. Its story about a guy from nowhere getting an impossible shot and running with it, learning he can't win but can prove himself to the world -- and himself -- is perfectly told. Rocky III, though, takes the same character and shows how much he's grown and changed over the last four-ish years, and does it in a tight-as-fuck 95 minutes. Everyone is at the top of their games, even Talia Shire who finally gets something to do in one of these movies besides looking concerned. She's also amazingly hot during the brief moment when she's washing her hair in the hotel. And speaking of hot: Carl Weathers! Goddamn, that man is cut from stone. (Hell, the camera even takes some time to linger on his dick during one of the running scenes, because even the camera can't contain itself while looking at Apollo.) Pauly's racism I could absolutely do without, but it makes sense for the character and shows how much he's grown by the end of the film. But eh, I don't like it. And Des is spot on: Clubber is a literal monster. Sure, Thunderlips is a beast, but it's an act with him. He's a carny. Clubber's anger and power and determination is all him. Perfect performance, especially the chilling fourth wall break: "Pain."

It might be my favourite Rocky film so far. Talia Shire IS sexy in this one and not like a mousy second thought. Carl Weathers in 1982 is body goals and kicked off my recent workout frenzy. I don't do resolutions, but I do now. I want to bench 300 lbs by the end of this year and that's basically because of this movie.

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Rocky III is, for me, the epitome of "you're flicking through the channels on Sunday afternoon and this comes on and you immediately put the remote down" movies. Rocky is a tremendous film, and Rocky IV is probably the greatest slice of 80s cheese you will ever be ridiculously entertained by, but Rocky III is a really solid movie that sucks you in almost entirely on the strength of Mr. T's performance.

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Mr. T does not get enough credit for his performance in Rocky III. He's basically playing a mean, angry Rocky, whereas Stallone has slipped into the Apollo role of rich, seasoned champ.

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My only issue with the film (ONLY issue) is that Apollo Creed, who by all accounts is retired, comes back to train Rocky. That's cool, but the marker by which they determine Rocky's readiness for Clubber Lang is beating an older guy in a race on the beach. It's a little weird, but it does lead to the greatest ocean hug in cinema history.

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The best thing about the Creed series is that it's a celebration of Carl Weathers' Apollo Creed character, who you don't think the series recognized how unbelievably awesome he was throughout. In the Creed movies, he's basically treated like a god, and Weathers' performance really makes that work. It's an almost super-heroic presence. 

There is some funny racial stuff in that the subtext for Creed training Rocky is basically teaching him how to dance in a room full of black people. I say funny because it's kind of dumb and could only be thought up by the writer and director (Stallone), but ultimately harmless because it's not as though Rocky's newfound sense of rhythm really saves him. It's the EYE OF THE TIGER.

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There's a lot of racial subtext going on in the gym, most of which I think was unintended by Stallone. But watching Rocky III in 2019, it's hard to miss.

Something I find interesting about Rocky in parts II and III is that he's taught new techniques (right-handed fighting and rhythm / speed), yet he really doesn't use those tactics to win either fight. In Rocky II he reverts to southpaw boxing almost right away, and while his newfound speed does help in Rocky III, really, he just goes back to tiring people out by using his face as a  punching bag.

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Yeah in III he basically rope-a-dopes Clubber. In IV the strategy is to see how long his bones and organs last before they're pounded into jelly.

Spoiler

The answer turned out to be the length between the end of IV and the start of V

 

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Rocky IV: This is quite bad. It's not even fun like it used to be. (Well, save for Apollo's pro-American OTT introduction and the in-Russia training montage.) It's simply one shitty montage after another, with horrid pacing, bad editing, no characterization, and a fight that's more of a brawl than a boxing match.

With that in mind, this is the first Rocky movie I'd call an action flick.

Rocky and Rocky II are dramas with boxing. Rocky III is a movie about boxing, but is still a character study. But Rocky IV? Pure 1980s, sweaty action with punches that sound like explosions.

Funnily, Ivan Drago is not a bad guy. Yeah, he kills Apollo and drops the "if he dies, he dies" line, but that's how he's been manufactured. It's his handlers that are the bad ones. He really gets the short end of the stick in terms of movie villains.

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Venom: Too many jokes. Way, way too many jokes. Venom is a terrifying monster and should be treated that way. And why would an alien symbiote have an English name? Also, way to undercut Venom by having him admit he is a “loser” on his planet.

Films Watched: 1

 

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On 1/12/2019 at 8:14 PM, S-T said:

And why would an alien symbiote have an English name?

That bugged me too

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