Happy Birthday Des!


Koete

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Dread, no punch you could deliver could equal the pain I was in on Sunday. Besides, as I recall, your last coherent words were, "Tequila, I hate this stuff," as you poured it into yourself like it was nectar of the gods.

The thing about tequila is that after the first or even the second shot you feel like a million bucks. Then it kicks you in the stomach like a machine designed exclusively for the purpose of kicking you in the stomach. Then you are harnessed and locked into this machine for about the next twelve to fifteen hours. During this phase, sensors linking the machine with your brain register every time you even think about food and the machine kicks you in the stomach.

Later, when the machine is finally removed from your body, it is placed inside a glass case at the back of your closet. Attached to the case is a tiny hammer and a sign. The sign reads: "In case of Dread's birthday, break glass."

See you next year, Stomach Kicking Machine.

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Dread, no punch you could deliver could equal the pain I was in on Sunday. Besides, as I recall, your last coherent words were, "Tequila, I hate this stuff," as you poured it into yourself like it was nectar of the gods.

The thing about tequila is that after the first or even the second shot you feel like a million bucks. Then it kicks you in the stomach like a machine designed exclusively for the purpose of kicking you in the stomach. Then you are harnessed and locked into this machine for about the next twelve to fifteen hours. During this phase, sensors linking the machine with your brain register every time you even think about food and the machine kicks you in the stomach.

Later, when the machine is finally removed from your body, it is placed inside a glass case at the back of your closet. Attached to the case is a tiny hammer and a sign. The sign reads: "In case of Dread's birthday, break glass."

See you next year, Stomach Kicking Machine.

Seriously, we're attempting Tequila again? Fancy another fine walk home, D-Man?!

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